Last week I posed the question ‘how do you review a game that you didn’t like, but also isn’t very memorable’? I got many answers but the one I liked the most was from @Alocidej. He said “quickly” So that’s how I’m going to review today’s game… very, very, quickly… until writing about it brings back bad memories and I go on a bit of a rant.
Before I do, let me explain how this blog series works
I have a TON of games I own but never beat, I want to play them all and review them.
Now there are some RULES about my backlog.
- Every game I own and never beat was placed into a random list maker.
- I MUST beat the games in order decided by the random list maker.
- I can only skip RPGs because they take a long time (but I must still beat them in order)
- I can’t skip any other game.
- If I buy another game, it gets put in a random place in the list.
- If I get a new game I REALLY wanna play, I can make it next in the list.
- Games in a series (ie Halo) were placed in order from first to last.
- When a game is done, it will be reviewed.
Now let’s start this week’s review.
Review #2 – Capsized
Capsized is a 2D platformer made from a VERY small indie crew. It’s about a crew of astronauts crash landing on an alien planet. The crew needs to explore the planet, repair their ship, fight, and escape. I’ll start with the positives. For being such a small team, the design and game is very ambitious. Also the soundtrack is awesome.
Now, let’s look at the negatives of this game. Before writing this review, I was looking at reviews other people wrote and I saw something that really stuck with me. A Steam Review said “the level design works against you” and that is 100% true. The game has a series of levels each with an objective. The objective is either go there, kill that, or collect this. This is fine for the first few levels but then everything goes to shit. The level objectives begin to repeat, making the game monotonous and then the level just get longer and longer. Fuck you level 11. The controls are floaty and unintuitive. This makes precision jumping, and precision platforming infuriating. They give you a grapple beam and occasional jetpack to help alleviate the issue, but it doesn’t help.
The WORST part of this game is the enemies. They’re easy to defeat, but their placement is bullshit. A lot of times enemies appear off screen, and can take out half your health before you see them. Even though they’re easy to kill, they also deal a ton of damage. They also blend into the background, fly all around, and swarm you. Fuck em!
Once you beat the game you unlock some stuff, but who cares. This game is meh, and tedious, and sometimes infuriating. Mostly it’s meh.
Score: Meh out of Meh.
Next game: Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccooness